In the LDS singles ward I live in we recently had a huge influx of engaged couples, including me. So for the lesson in Elder's Quorum the presidency decided that the 5 five or so engaged men get up and tell the process of how they decided to get married. I had the fortune of listening to everyone else's experience before I shared my thoughts. As I listened it struck me how differently everyone approached that decision and how varied the difficulty of that decision was for everyone.
I realized that the revelatory process in regards to getting married wasn't different from the other major life decisions we have made. But marriage is THE decision. It is the BIG decision. So we may naturally stress out about it. But is the process all that different from other decisions we make in our life? What college to go to? What to major in? Where to live? What job to take? For me the decision about what college to go to wasn't really a decision. I knew where I wanted to go. But what major I should do required more thought and prayer. However, I know many who have the exact opposite experience. Some decisions come naturally to us and others require us to seek out more guidance and help. Why should it be different with the decision to get married?
Jill, my betrothed, asked me as we were talking about the possibility of getting married if I had prayed about it. "Ummm...not directly I guess." I had never asked God directly if I should marry Jill. I had prayed every day expressing my gratitude for the simple fact that she was in my life. I had prayed expressing my intentions of where I wanted the relationship to go but I had never asked if that was the right decision. I had prayed for guidance in my life to make good decisions but never specifically about getting married to Jill. I just felt good about the relationship and I never felt the need to ask God if it was the right decision. But due to Jill's question I did ask directly. The impression I got was that I was already on the right path and that I really didn't need to ask because I had already received my answer.
My ability to make that decision came naturally to me. I just knew that is what I wanted. For Jill though it was not that easy. And as I listened to others in my elders quorum tell of their experiences I saw others who needed more guidance than me and some who needed less than me. And I don't think one experience is better than any other. We all experience revelation with God differently and we all face our life decisions differently from decision to decision.